Thursday, December 1, 2011
I did it again! This year was easier and more difficult. It was both. This story came out more coherently and with more structure than the last, but the structure of the experience made it feel a little less exciting. Last year I had no idea what I was capable of. This year I had confidence but was also scared I couldn't pull it off again.
I love that the month of writing pushes you to just create and worry about editing later. I love that it teaches you to sit and write every day, that every day you have something to contribute. It is a strange experience to spend so much time in your head with new people. I'd be thinking about Mina's pit bull or thinking about how I need to give Anna more attention. Mina was the attention hog. I would be eating breakfast and have an idea-- "Oh! This is going to happen!" Or, "Oh, this has to happen." It was challenging and saddening to think about creating a relationship and then showing its cracks and then letting the women decide what they wanted for themselves.
I don't want to sound like one of those writers, those, "The characters just talk to me, they do. I have conversations with them when I'm in the tub." It's not like that at all. Writing is work; it is the brain firing with complete focus. The other stuff sounds clever and maybe exciting, but it takes away from the fact that it is very, very hard to write. It just is. And having conversations with people that others cannot see or hear is usually very scary-- from what I've heard from people who do this daily.
So. I'm set to edit. I have a clear plan and I know the story's weak points and what needs to be further developed. It feels almost as amazing to finish 50,000 words in a month as to know I'm on such firm ground with the story.
Hey, agent who contacted me a year and a half ago, I'm ready for you!